There is little debate about life’s richest playground for both crisis and joy—this life-long venture we all call parenting. We try tools, read volumes, ask around, and scroll the squares, all for the latest parenting tips that speak to the crisis or confound of the moment.
From the terrible-twos to the even-worse-threes to elementary school drama to pre-teen cliques to absent adolescents…and beyond, Brandon and Analyn Miller have seen it all. With a brood of 7 of their own plus years of influence in the lives of families around them, this couple has built an expertise in parenting that few ever achieve. They admittedly don’t have every answer, but they certainly have an arsenal of experience.
Today, at Isogo, we are thrilled to partner with Brandon and Analyn to share strengths-based parenting tips that are sure to propel you into more thoughtful, joyful parenting in 2019.
4 Strengths-Based Parenting Tipis in 2019
1 :: Stay in Discovery Mode
From the moment our babes are born or we receive our adopted little ones, we are enthralled by their uniqueness. The goal for a Strengths-Based parent is to stay in this mode as our kids mature through the stages of development. This is not an easy challenge.
Remaining in Discovery Mode requires us to keep our eyes searching for who our child is, rather than getting caught up in what they do. Especially when what they do is counter to our expressed wishes for their behavior.
Whatever you do, do not lose the sense of discovery.
2 :: Let Your Kids Evolve
As your kids mature, resist the urge to pigeon hole them into one activity over another, even if you spot the signs of apparent talent. Kids change as they develop.
One child may enjoy an activity, and show aptitude, only to lose interest as the activity requires more from them concerning time and commitment. It is common to press them to continue, and in some cases this is the right approach.
However, pay close attention to their eyes.
As your kids find enjoyment and energy from an activity, their eyes will shine and excellence will follow. If the activity truly isn’t bringing them into a state of “flow”, then it might be time to consider an alternative.
3 :: Play to their Strengths
As you identify and honor you kids’ strengths, your goal as Strengths-Based parents is to find ways to tilt time in their favor. Essentially, you give your kids more time to engage in the academic subjects and extracurricular activities that lend to sustained excellence—for THEM.
This does not mean you ignore areas of required competence or move past the opportunity to develop resilience. Yet it does suggest that you engage them in the places that increase their energy and engagement levels, all the while using their energy reserves to shore up required areas of competence.
This is not in our nature. Yet, when you commit to this countercultural perspective, they will shine beyond measure.
4 :: Focus on the Positive
Your kids look to us for affirmation and encouragement. Your disposition toward them, both verbal and non-verbal go a long way to shape their self-image.
Strengths-Based parents look for opportunities to invest in the well-being of their kids by consistently affirming them and building into our kids’ self-confidence. Your words carry weight and will be remembered long after your kids move out of your home.
In our case, even our adult kids continue to look to us to affirm their choices and stand in the place of being their most active supporters.
This trust is build from the very beginning.
{Thank you, Brandon and Analyn for your practical, impactful parenting tips as we all grow in our strengths-based approach to raising our kids!}
This year, Brandon and Analyn Miller come out with the book we’ve been waiting for—a parenting playbook that gives us tools to truly see our kids through the gifts they have been given and encourage them to live the lives they are wired for.
Follow their book progress, weekly parenting advice, and opportunities to see them live over at analynbrandon.com.
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